Stephen Does The Math On Manafort's Jail Time

  • Am Vor 5 Tage

    The Late Show with Stephen ColbertThe Late Show with Stephen Colbert

    Dauer: 10:49

    It's hard to keep track of all the crimes for which Paul Manafort has been charged and convicted. Stephen breaks down the math.
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    The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

Stew Artisan
Stew Artisan

Stephen = certfied Canadian....

Vor 4 Stunden
Paul Edwards
Paul Edwards

He gets out in 2 years or less. Calling it right now.

Vor 5 Stunden
Alex Muncatchy
Alex Muncatchy

Trump: "we didn't have to do this. We could have delayed it, or we could have done nothing at all." I knew it. This clown, even when faced with a relatively easy solution, will make it sound like he made a brave choice as to not appear like he's taking the advice of counsel. The inferiority complex of this guy is staggering. I am surprised that he hasn't bought a massive pickup truck just to do burn-outs out of High School parking lots.

Vor 6 Stunden
Jes The Red
Jes The Red

Not everyone who uses a wheel chair can't stand or walk, sometimes they just cant do so reliably. And I HATE IT when people try to use Wheelchairs to garner sympathy, they affect everyone who actually needs to use them.

Vor 10 Stunden
Books by Roni
Books by Roni

Two plane crashes and the 737 max 8 is grounded for "safety reasons" but try to stop white supremacists from shooting up mosques and the USA implodes...

Vor 10 Stunden
Tonni Tingholm Kristensen
Tonni Tingholm Kristensen

I miss the old Colbert

Vor 11 Stunden
420 Friendly
420 Friendly

"Bed-u" 😕

Vor 13 Stunden
CNN News ToDay
CNN News ToDay

lol I hope they put Trump in prison and force him to watch only Steven Colbert 24/7.

Vor 15 Stunden
j g
j g

Well that's the full story, 300 words. And now for the adverbs and adjectives. Ah ha, the magic 800! Copy boy!! Been there, inflated that.

Vor 17 Stunden
mb
mb

P.s. Totally wrong with the Canadian impression. Ever been to Toronto Montreal or Vancouver? No beavers or moose about.

Vor 19 Stunden
mb
mb

Can't believe you joked [in length] about 2 Boeing max 8's that went down. Almost 400 dead. WTF?

Vor 19 Stunden
Pitt Posum
Pitt Posum

some people get more jail time for possession of a couple of grams of marijuana... money talks.

Vor 22 Stunden
DeborahFishburn
DeborahFishburn

PLEASE don't (even for the funny) push the idea that people in wheelchairs can never stand. Lots of truly disabled people are able to stand for short periods at need, as long as they have the chair to collapse back into afterwards. The issue is that able-bodied people THEN try to claim they therefore have no need of the chair - or the disabled parking place - at all.

Vor 23 Stunden
Hong Fei Bai
Hong Fei Bai

Remember when in high school we learned how math was going to be useful one day? And now 19-24 years plus another sentence of a certain amount of years equals 7 years in prison? What happened to math? If you have one body how can you serve two sentences at the same time?

Vor Tag
Orall Cornelius
Orall Cornelius

I've had a theory that comedy & comedians don't really care about anything or anyone. Is it possible that they're laughing at the deaths of hundreds of people in 2 plane crashes, at least indirectly?

Vor Tag
McKinley Benson
McKinley Benson

Love the show. Just a quick note though -- it is ableist to make jokes about a person in a wheelchair being miraculously cured if they stand up. More than 80% of people who use wheelchairs are capable of standing and walking, but use wheelchairs to improve overall mobility.

Vor Tag
Cody Berg
Cody Berg

Lol Hillary Clinton's served two countries at the same time she didn't get jail time

Vor Tag
Cody Berg
Cody Berg

Wow it's pretty racist talking about Canadians like that

Vor Tag
Tsnore
Tsnore

Lock 'im up!

Vor Tag
Sweety
Sweety

Not funny, just Un-Subscribed; and I'm not sorry.

Vor Tag
The Musical Stylings of Brent Bunn
The Musical Stylings of Brent Bunn

I'm offensive and I find Stephen's impression very Canadian.

Vor Tag
carschmn
carschmn

Love the Colbert calculator.

Vor Tag
Artem Bentsionov
Artem Bentsionov

I believe Bill Maher called Manafort’s sentence reduction a “white guy discount”.

Vor Tag
Sandra Patterson
Sandra Patterson

Artem Bentsionov That's hilarious. Good for Bill! 👏👏👏👏

Vor 21 Stunde
Michael Moreton
Michael Moreton

Its not nice to make fun of Canada and Canadians. At least I dont think it is and if I am wrong please forgive me.

Vor Tag
breakshot74
breakshot74

i really love the calculator part

Vor 2 Tage
wiredwebmaster
wiredwebmaster

absolutely love when stephen makes a blunder, laughs at it, and keeps it moving. Such a fantastic host.

Vor 2 Tage
Sara Burke
Sara Burke

Grounding the planes is the only thing trump has done that I agree with

Vor 2 Tage
geerdude
geerdude

colbert is still funny even when he messes up the punchline!

Vor 2 Tage
Tahira Porter
Tahira Porter

Asante Sana Stephen !! Thank you for putting some hilarity in our lives! Much needed in these times. As we say in Kenya your show is Poa Sana (very awesome)

Vor 2 Tage
Canuck867
Canuck867

Sorry, but stereotyping canadians like that is just a blindside hit, no dowt! Sorry. Like my pet moose wouldn't hava donnybrook with a beav unless it was just hosed eh bud. Like just beauty hosed too. Sorry! Gad, this just gets me steamed, eh! Sorry, i gotta go fer a rip and have a dart to try and cool my jets. Sorry. Thanks fer chattin boot us eh!

Vor 2 Tage
Abel1120 conlget
Abel1120 conlget

😂🍻

Vor 2 Tage
Malay Agarwal
Malay Agarwal

Oooohhhhh, that burn. That. Burn.

Vor 2 Tage
J x 3
J x 3

This program is not very funny anymore.

Vor 2 Tage
Creighton Freeman
Creighton Freeman

It is ironic that the video clip of Trump has him sitting in front of a sculpture of two of the iconic Yellowstone National Park animals that his environmental policy is threatening to drive to extinction.

Vor 2 Tage
Laydie Elle
Laydie Elle

As an Australian, it makes sense that Americans make fun of Canadians. Canada is their polar opposite: polite and respectful.

Vor 2 Tage
the last of the lemmings
the last of the lemmings

7:46 funny! That's karma for hackin on everyone else. Lol

Vor 2 Tage
Anisa Mazaki
Anisa Mazaki

Jokes aside, I'm grateful that "agent orange" did atleast one thing right for a change. Ps - @colbert, please stop making fun of Canadians. Your continual stereotyping of them is no longer funny. Not all Canadians are nice/polite people. They're human too. Just saying.

Vor 2 Tage
Music Feign
Music Feign

While Colbert and writers are hilarious, completely inappropriate on the crash comments. Off limits guys, off limits. There is much comedy to find that doesn't involve lost lives. Please stop.

Vor 2 Tage
Jason Holmes
Jason Holmes

Trump is all of a sudden so concerned with the well being of Americans?

Vor 2 Tage
Irene Mesecke
Irene Mesecke

Love the calculator skits and also the Melania sketches. Need a bit of practice with your singing skills and when you lose it, this little old lady from downunder laughs out loud in a world where there is so much hatred.

Vor 2 Tage
Sapphire Riddles
Sapphire Riddles

... If he'd quit talking without explaining why he did it, he'd have done a good job...

Vor 2 Tage
Citadel of winds
Citadel of winds

What sort of person makes fun of a malingerer in a wheelchair? Colbert: Hold my cold beer.

Vor 2 Tage
Vincent Ciccone
Vincent Ciccone

There is no war room.... DOJ used to be called DOW (department of war)

Vor 2 Tage
Vincent Ciccone
Vincent Ciccone

Fake Jail time. Its a suspended sentence

Vor 2 Tage
Victor Green
Victor Green

Uh I

Vor 2 Tage
A Gramckow
A Gramckow

... you can need a wheel chair and still be able to stand or walk under your own power for a brief period of time. I'm not saying this is Manaforts deal, but there are many people who need wheel chairs who are not completely incapable of walking.

Vor 2 Tage
Judy FIELDS DAVIS
Judy FIELDS DAVIS

Les Miserable. The French Revolution is an act of God.”. The plot of Les Misérables begins in 1815 when the main character, Jean Valjean, is released from a 19-year prison and hard labour sentence for stealing a loaf of bread.

Vor 3 Tage
FlowerofDissolution
FlowerofDissolution

Trump's hair is like he's wearing a hair-helmet: IT IS SO STRANGE AND WEIRD! Never ever do this at home kids. Stay safe!

Vor 3 Tage
cshubs
cshubs

I think I might want to die in a plane crash rather than watch Infinity Wars again. What kind of ending was that???

Vor 3 Tage
Joe Brennan
Joe Brennan

This show sucks, always the same crap about Trump every night for 2years. .

Vor 3 Tage
Oliver Descullo
Oliver Descullo

Colbert has revealed his mental issues after the American people elected Trump president.

Vor 3 Tage
Jeffrey Photonboy
Jeffrey Photonboy

Darn, perfect "Windows Update" joke opportunity missed there considering all the screw-ups they have caused.

Vor 3 Tage
CCTV Cayak Crime TV
CCTV Cayak Crime TV

I'm not authorized to say we have a learjet to Belize, engines running on standby, on 3 different local airfields. Costs 10.000 thousands of Dollars a day. All for a total witch hunt and fake news!

Vor 3 Tage
DunantheDefender
DunantheDefender

7.5 for all that stuff when half of it should have given him 24... bullshit.

Vor 3 Tage
ShariSez1
ShariSez1

There isn't a damn word in this clip about Manafort, you idiots.

Vor 3 Tage
Steven Klaysmat
Steven Klaysmat

AVE had a good discussion about the Boeing Crashes if anyone is interested in the technical side

Vor 3 Tage
Mike Hike
Mike Hike

I looked through the comments to see if anyone shed light on the "faux pas" moment (at 7:45); in case anyone else was similarly curious, buried in a thread on the comments from below was this take by "drangus": _"He messes up the line and says either f**k or s**t."_ That seemed obvious, but may be helpful for clarification. (I'm not a lip reader, but seems it was the second four-letter-word.)

Vor 3 Tage
The Life Of A Skip Bin Man
The Life Of A Skip Bin Man

why isnt hillary in jail for selling american secretes to who knows who why, why would you want bill who was getting a head job when running the country, and his wife who is failed estate agent and would sell you and america to the chinese , germans, russians, she would in flame wars every where, the middle east would of been another bush bullshit storey of weapons of mass destruction, are you people serious. we got rid of head job bill , bull shit bill, gay couple obama , and sell outy hillary who loves wars, and who wanted to get rid of puttin, but she meet her match with puttin. and thank you russia for cleaning up america. we need more. Americans are fucking dick heads, thank god russian loveS there children.

Vor 3 Tage
Little Mac
Little Mac

7.5 years still isn;'t enough for that piece of shit. Down with the 1%!!! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!!! Support AOC!!! Vote Bernie Sanders!!!

Vor 3 Tage
Brittany Wehrman
Brittany Wehrman

Not all people in wheelchairs are unable to walk, you know. Some can stand. Some can stand, but only for certain period of time because of the immense amount of strain it takes, and they would rather use a chair than use crutches/braces/canes because, again, of the amount of strain. It doesn't make them any less "wheelchair worthy" or mean they are "pretending" to need one.

Vor 3 Tage
jordan secrist
jordan secrist

stephen colbert is not a tiltdown man

Vor 3 Tage
John Watt
John Watt

As a Canadian it's always fun to see Americans trying to get into it. Canada has been sold out for so long, to Americans first, it took the rest of the world banning these aircraft before Canada decided to go along. If our current political regime wasn't already deep in criminal controversy, they probably would have just kept doing what Americans said. I hope this less than efficient aircraft re-design and the fraudulent efforts to cover it up become the news, not just political posturing.

Vor 3 Tage
Cynthia Brent
Cynthia Brent

SDNY is kinda like The Incredible Hulk. When the sentence came down they transformed into the angry superhero. "Your Honor don't make me angry. You won't like it when I get angry...🤣🤣🤣

Vor 3 Tage
Cynthia Brent
Cynthia Brent

Entering the courtroom in a wheelchair then when told to stand up he does it without assistance? Did a mafia crime boss come back to help manafool?

Vor 3 Tage
Oh Yeah?
Oh Yeah?

During Stephen's bit about the reporter creating fill for his nothing story assignment I had another one of those Colbert attacks where I was laughing so hard it hurt. One of these days Stephen's going to give me a heart attack.

Vor 3 Tage
Shawn
Shawn

Is it just me or have we as humans become desensitized to the loss of life? Hundreds of people died, ceased to exist, and they're making jokes? Compare this to 30-40 years ago...

Vor 3 Tage
Survivor #9
Survivor #9

Too soon

Vor 3 Tage
Suzette Figgs
Suzette Figgs

SMH????

Vor 3 Tage
Suzette Figgs
Suzette Figgs

New York!!!!

Vor 3 Tage
Kamran Sadique
Kamran Sadique

Stephen is the funniest man on TV....on Youtube!

Vor 3 Tage
Francis Glz
Francis Glz

As far as I know conspiracy carries a minimum of 10 years last time I check! And at the federal level they don’t even have to prove it is enough with a person saying u did it, when drug related but this is treason.

Vor 3 Tage
Viorel Mocan
Viorel Mocan

Thank you again comrade SC for another unbiased piece of sugar coated far left activism.

Vor 3 Tage
Alexander Forrest
Alexander Forrest

Best late night monologue I've seen in a while

Vor 3 Tage
J B
J B

Water Protectors and an independent journalist got more time than Manafort , without committing any crimes, but for PEACEFULLY DEMONSTRATING the endangerment of OUR AQUIFERS, and the journalist covered that news. There is NO real justice this country. BUMMER.

Vor 3 Tage
Leanne Blake
Leanne Blake

You have to Love New Yorker . Bloody Hell Steve Munchin? Head on him like a Robbers Dog.

Vor 3 Tage
Leanne Blake
Leanne Blake

As a Australian , I fly on plane , but only if its QANTAS.

Vor 3 Tage
Derek Gold
Derek Gold

👍👍👍👍👍Ahhhahahahahah

Vor 3 Tage
Rene Dulnuan
Rene Dulnuan

You can count on your Mama on it?

Vor 3 Tage
chas4702
chas4702

Collusion Report: No Collusion found. End of report. Money wasted 10 Billion.

Vor 3 Tage
Patrick Cosgrove
Patrick Cosgrove

I have to think that Stephen's Roman Catholic petticoats are showing!

Vor 3 Tage
Taul
Taul

Whelp, guess mercury is rx, even Stephen is human. Just like the choir. Yeah!

Vor 3 Tage
Daniel Galan
Daniel Galan

7 1/2 years for treason? White collar crime does pay!

Vor 3 Tage
Obi1kenobi10
Obi1kenobi10

I LOVE NEW YORK!!!!!!!!!!

Vor 3 Tage
Steve Louis
Steve Louis

Not sure it's terribly funny to joke about the 737 crashes.

Vor 3 Tage
Eric Koontz
Eric Koontz

...walk up to the biggest guy in the Yard, and say... "Mr President, can I have a pardon??" YESSSSSS!!!

Vor 3 Tage
Ula Yee
Ula Yee

Canada joke... haha... funny NOT!! It’s as if all mr Colbert knows about Canada he has learnt from a couple of McKenzie Brothers skits. Because all Canadians speak with a Newfoundland accent. Pretty ignorant on the part of mr Colbert. Mr Colbert, you’d do better sticking to poking fun of your orange humpty in chief.

Vor 3 Tage
Gene Phipps
Gene Phipps

Actually he said, "Here...hold my Martini " =)

Vor 4 Tage
Andrew Homiak
Andrew Homiak

Not to question Stephen Colbert's smut-writing capabilities, but "bedewed"? Is she a lawn?

Vor 4 Tage
overseastom
overseastom

Some of these felt a bit too soon, man! Laughing about the autopilot causing nosedives is weird when 300+ people have died from it in just a few months

Vor 4 Tage
N K
N K

I like maths I love maths maths is my life and I’m afraid to fly

Vor 4 Tage
superlearner9
superlearner9

One of the best yet! GR SC!

Vor 4 Tage
Nancy Deis
Nancy Deis

Great Job Stephen Love a Canadian

Vor 4 Tage
jean tyler
jean tyler

Manifort deserves the death penalty for betraying his own country. Yet he is rich, white, and connected. SO WRONG.

Vor 4 Tage
Don Berry
Don Berry

Steven, love you and I'm hardly p.c.but jokes on this are too soon. These people just died.

Vor 4 Tage
Eric Baker-Alt
Eric Baker-Alt

Trump is going to pardon Manafort, at least from the federal crimes. Every time he says he wasn't thinking about it (anything), it means he's already made up his mind.

Vor 4 Tage
Drunken Master II
Drunken Master II

that fake Canadian accent was on point.

Vor 4 Tage
Cristen
Cristen

I don't know Manafort's medical history but it is perfectly possible that he may have a condition which causes him variable mobility issues... don't want to laugh at or discredit someone for having the same problems I do, needing a cane or wheelchair sometimes but also being able to stand on my own

Vor 4 Tage
Christopher Bland
Christopher Bland

Great to see the rest of the world took to ground the 737 before DUMP did

Vor 4 Tage
Mystical Light Goddess
Mystical Light Goddess

Please help Tulsi Gabbard and Marianne Williamson need 60000 donors of $1 each to qualify for debate.

Vor 4 Tage
NoCleverName
NoCleverName

From 8:47 on -- It's a delightfully nostalgic revisit to Stephen's circa 2003 epic thriller-mystery as told through the eyes, thoughts, and words of a whimsical, yet oblivious investigative journalist -- "Wigfield." As succinctly, yet praisingly, put by one of the critics feeling compelled enough to say something for the back cover -- a person going by the apparent pseudonym, "Jon Stewart," -- "To me, WIGFIELD is a deeply funny, refreshingly original book, but to be fair, it is the first book I've ever read." Well, Mr. Stewart (if that is your real name), you are one step ahead of me as I have yet to finish my copy due to the scratching and other blemishes I need to remove from disc -- er, uh, Chapter -- three, which resulted from my copy inadvertently tumbling out of my car as I was hurrying off to work one morning. I have the audio version in CD format and, as there are no versions available in print, either in paper or electronic formats, I must take it upon myself as taught through example by the book's hero, Russell Hokes, to conclude that the only logical conclusion is that the publisher must have started with their initial push in 2003 as a massive CD-only campaign seeing the digital era that we were embarking into in 2003 and having the wise foresight to know that soon, no one would be reading print media any more. After receiving such a successful return from this initial push, the publisher must have taken 100% of the return and done the only logical thing, which was to re-invest it back into the only media form that proved successful for this book -- audio, of course -- and produced a second batch of CDs. In their infinite wisdom, the publisher could see that print form was, at this point, truly unnecessary. "Books begone! Onward and upward! We are in the dawning of a new era -- the digital media era!," they assumedly proclaimed. Unfortunately for them, their infinite wisdom, although infinite, lacking the customary bounds of space and time, would soon prove to have limits moreso than boundaries. To use a mathematical term, "finite." Their infinite wisdom would prove to be finite, indeed. Who could have foreseen in 2003 that a small hand-held device known as the "Kindle" was on the rise; worse yet, it's more ubiquitous successor, the "smart phone?" Indeed, the people of the future -- relative to 2003 -- would learn to, not just read again, but re-learn how much fun it was as a child to read. Yes, reading became popular again. So, what is our takeaway, Reader's Digest, book report summary moral of the story of this delightful book known as "Wigfield?" "Wigfield" is simply and profoundly a publishing anomaly. We can see in the story of the publishing of "Wigfield," the story of a book whose publishing, and initial release, and subsequent marketing campaign, all occurred right on the cusp of a turning point in media history. In the story of the publishing of "Wigfield," we have captured a lightning flash moment in time precisely between the dawning of the new digital era and print media's glory days of yore -- only to be renaissanced back to life with the advent of the Kindle and the smart phone, as discussed above, but that's not the thesis here. So, keeping on-track, the publishing of "Wigfield" happened during a relative moment in our history when we were right between an old age of print media and a new age of digital media - we were in a very very small period of time in which we essentially had NO media. Surely, scholars of the distant future will look back on that tiny moment of time and refer to it as the "Dark Ages Of Media." Of course, we did not know this at the time; notwithstanding, gambles were made regarding the publishing of "Wigfield." All bets were placed in that moment on publishing in audio format only. It could have gone terribly bad, or it could have been incredibly successful. We may never know how it eventually did turn out. As they say, "Hindsight's 20/20." There are so many lessons to be learned. In the case of "Wigfield," you live and you learn. Oh, by the way, if you like Mr. Colbert's somewhat sarcastic, sometimes artificially oblivious sharp wit, then look for "Wigfield" anywhere audiobooks are sold -- I understand that, nowadays, you can find a bunch of them for sale somewhere down in The Amazon. (If you are a fan of "Wigfield" then you recognize the writing style presented above. The long, run-on sentences, apparent contradictions within sentences, overly-eloquent diction in some areas juxtaposed with juvenile [and even faulty] logic, giving the sense of a high school student trying to sound more advanced in his writing than he actually is -- all of this is deliberate farce. The above writing style is not for real, it's just a joke, modeled respectfully after Stephen's own style used in "Wigfield" and prior to that, as the [fictional] oblivious news reporter he played on The Daily Show before he began performing as himself on The Late Show.)

Vor 4 Tage

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